Dear Diary, are the kids ok?

Since the week of, which was understandably sad, the kids have been pretty normal. B had one instance where he flat looked me in the eye and asked "When dad was sick, why did you tell me he was going to be ok?" That broke my heart. B also had a few times where he just wanted to stay with me instead of going somewhere. He also had one angry episode when he came back from the hunting trip. He wanted me to let him go hunting alone on our property but I shut that down. His angry episode was a different kind of anger, almost like a panic anger. I gave him some space and we moved past it and not much else has happened. A, well, she's older. She just got quiet and kind of stopped doing anything. She moved out of the dorms, wanted to stop some activities but then after a while started actually participating. She's my shy, quiet one so I'm glad she's participating. She hasn't asked me anything. I keep track of her whether she know or not. She has some close family members that she talks to and they are making sure she is ok. I've noticed that B seems to have more support than A, it's probably because he's so young but let's add that worry to the ever growing list of emotions and concerns. It' will be ok. As he would say, "It is what it is" or "You can't let that stuff worry you". He would have been

the better parent to get left behind.

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No follow up here. I think we are all doing the best we can navigating this new normal. I've asked them many times if they want to talk to someone, a therapist or a counselor. No takers so far. It's just getting up every day, one foot in front of the other, take the hit's put a band aid on till it heals and keep on going.